The Irony
by MorbidMordred
Summary: Soubi finds Ritsuka’s real name.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Running down the street Soubi skidded to a slippery stop in front of Ritsuka's house. He hurriedly climbed up to the second floor balcony; he paused for the quickest second to catch his breath. Soubi quietly slid the glass door open and drew aside the curtains. He cast his worried blue eyes about the room. He was dripping from the rain, soaked from head to toe; his clothing and his hair were pasted to his body. He knew that this would be the reason for his Sacrifice's yelled rant later: him catching a cold and the dripped water on his floor. The only problem was that his Ritsuka was nowhere to be seen and his little blue cell phone was lying on the bed, blinking with the messages and email Soubi had been continually sending since the he had gotten out of school. He anxiously made his way around the room, looking for any clues, _anything _hinting to the boy's whereabouts. To go so long without hearing from him was highly unusual -- even if it was a simple "Leave me alone," he always received some kind of a response, and Soubi found the silence completely unnerving.

As he walked farther into the room, he noticed a sliver of light coming from the door that he couldn't remember having ever seen open before and there seemed to be a bit of a haze emitting from it. Quietly inching closer, he heard a humming that grew louder as he moved closer. An eyebrow raised in curiosity. The voice was easily recognizable -for someone who paid as much attention as he did that is- as Ritsuka. He peeked through the door, because he _had_ to be sure that the boy was ok, he rationalized. His eyes widened as he saw the boy in the most unguarded state he could ever remember seeing him: taking a bath -- taking a bath and _humming._

The small neko-boy lounged in the large bath, his slender leg bent up and out of the water as he washed it with a soapy cloth. Soubi watched his beloved Sacrifice, entranced as Ritsuka happily rinsed himself and finished his bath, but when he stood to dry off, Soubi glanced away. As much as he wanted to look, he had already invaded his Sacrifice's privacy enough for one day. He walked over to the bed and leaned against the footboard to wait for the boy who would emerge from the still slightly steaming bathroom, attempting nonchalance.

The dark-haired boy walked into the unlit room with a fluffy maroon towel wrapped around his slim hips, his hair still dripping slightly. Making his way right by the silent Soubi, who was too busily eyeing the exposed skin on display to announce his presence, Ritsuka turned and bent to retrieve his sleeping clothes from the bureau. Before he could reach out to open the drawer, he started in surprise as he heard a sharp gasp from behind him. He turned around quickly, taking a step back into the bureau while making sure to keep a secure hold on his towel, to spot the shocked Sentoki.

"What are you doing here?!" Ritsuka asked, too surprised to be angry, as he wrapped his arms around himself, trying to cover as much skin as possible without dropping his towel in the process. His eyes darted to the bathroom door -contemplating making a run for it- then back to Soubi. He knew there'd be no way he could outrun him, should Soubi decide to chase after him.

Soubi didn't answer. Instead he reached for the boy and gently turned him back around. Ritsuka could only move as Soubi wanted him to. "Your name," he said simply and without further explanation. "What?" was all that the Sacrifice could say as he felt Soubi sink to his knees his head lowering as he kept eye-contact. He felt the older man's hands rest softly on his hips, almost as though he was afraid to break the young boy. Ritsuka's heart hammered in his chest as he felt Soubi lightly tug at the towel. "Hey!" He said as he tried to move away. He stopped when he realized that Soubi wasn't trying to remove the towel and that it hadn't moved far down. He felt a feather light kiss so low on his back that it made him start and he attempted to move away again, but his Sentoki's grip was too strong and he didn't budge.

"What are you talking about?" he asked breathily as he gave up trying to shake Soubi's grip.

"Loveless" was Soubi's simple reply as his soft lips continued to lightly move against Ritsuka's smooth skin, his hand caressing the boy's silken tail as he did so. "Your real name."

"You found it?" Ritsuka asked, bewildered and rather unintelligently. He turned his head to try and get a look without moving his body much. "Soubi, stop. I want to see!" he said with a slight whine, trying to break the blonds grasp for a second time, again to no avail. "Let me see," he whined when the kisses and now licks didn't cease. Soubi finally pulled away but kept his hands tightly on the shorter boy's hips as he directed him to the bathroom. When Ritsuka turned to get a look at his name, Soubi's hands went back to the hips that where now facing him.

They both stared with fascination at the name reflected in the mirror. The lettering was rather mechanical and yet the lines still gave off a slightly jagged look. Momentarily, Soubi's rather brilliant blue eyes soon wandered down to Ritsuka, who still looked at his name in wonder as he moved this way and that, watching it change shape as he did so. Feeling a drop from the taller man's still wet hair, Ritsuka blinked as if awakening and looked up, noticing for the first time that his Sentoki was soaked. "Soubi, you're going to get sick if you don't dry off!" he said sternly, his face flushing red in anger and a hint of worry in his violet eyes "And look at this trail water, and these puddles!" he added as an afterthought. Soubi itched to kiss him. The boy pulled away from the blond, led him by the hand into his room, and handed him a dry towel.

Soubi smiled at his boy's predictable reaction and dried himself off. He took off his jacket and hung it on the back of the computer chair so that it could dry. He toweled his hair making sure it was completely dry, because it wouldn't do to continue to drip all over Ritsuka's room – even though his Sacrifice was incredibly cute when his face was red with anger and yelling.

Ritsuka moved to his bureau again and pulled out pants to sleep in and a long-sleeved shirt. "Why did you come?" he asked, walking back to the bathroom to change, leaving the door open just enough so he could hear Soubi's response. He glanced threw the sliver of open door to make sure the older man wasn't trying to peek.

"You weren't answering me." The Fighter answered simply.

"I had to stay after class. Shinonome-sensei wanted to talk to me about my paper," Ritsuka replied as he emerged, buttoning up his night shirt. "Did I worry you?" he asked, looking up through his lashes at the blue-eyed man.

"Yes." Soubi freely admitted.

"It's late." Ritsuka said, glancing at his digital clock, changing the subject.

"Should I leave?" The Fighter asked, following his gaze.

"It's still raining." The boy said, amethyst eyes shifting to his glass doors, out of which he could see the rain still falling in torrents.

"I could use your umbrella. I will bring it back this time." Soubi said with a small smile, remembering the stern reprimand he received every time he forgot to bring it back.

"Stay." Ritsuka said, not meeting Soubi's eyes as his hands lingered over the last button of his shirt. He moved over to the bed and crawled in, lifting up his comforter for Soubi. "Stay?" he said again, this time a little unsure of himself as he looked up at the taller man.

Soubi slipped off his shoes and eagerly slid into the bed, pulling an unresisting Ritsuka into his arms, his hand resting where he knew the newly discovered name was written. The Sentoki slipped his fingers under the waistband of his Sacrifice's pants, causing the boy to start closer to Soubi. The blond smiled contently as he began to caress the jagged lines of the name, tracing them. Ritsuka snuggled closer, leaned up, and placed the softest kiss onto Soubi's still-smiling lips; smiling at the irony, Loveless? One without love should not be able to kiss so sweetly, hold so tightly, nor smile so warmly.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

A peaceful Ritsuka let a small smile grace his lips as sleep lingered. His eyes still closed, he ran his outstretched arm and leg over the expanse of the bed. The half-smile quickly died on his lips as he sat up, his hair sticking up in asymmetrical angles, and stared at the empty space next to him. He was caught off guard by the sadness he felt. Soubi had gone, and he hadn't even noticed. He hadn't even said goodbye. The sadness was quickly replaced by a flash of anger. His eyes narrowed in irritation before he sighed and looked away.

He turned a pained gaze to his folded hands in his lap; he was unprepared for the disappointment he felt. Soubi was long gone - his side of the bed had long since cooled. In all honesty it was better that he had left early, especially since his mother could come in at any moment as he hadn't locked the door, but it didn't help to quell his disappointment. Ritsuka hefted himself out of bed, his ears flat against his head, chewing at his lip sadly. Dressing in a common outfit, consisting of a black button up and jeans, he didn't bother to do much with his hair; as he ran a hand through it, he allowed the silky strands stay where they fell. He rushed downstairs, he stood poised at the kitchen door waiting till his mother had turned around to rush in and grab his lunch, then he quickly sprinted out the front door before she could catch him. Overworking his small legs, he made it to school in record time, and far sooner than he needed to be there. But it was these moments that he cherished, it was his last chance to be alone before the other obnoxiously loud students arrived.

He made his way to the familiar empty classroom, and he hung his purple faux-fur lined jacket on a hook. He chose a seat near the window and spent the rest of his day looking out of it, waiting. The minutes passed excruciatingly slow, and the hours seemed like days. The day seemed determined to last forever; as it had a tendency to do when all one wanted was for it to end. He was too busy waiting for time to pass to notice his luck in the form of the other children who were giving Shinonome-sensei a rather hard time, so she had no time to notice his lack of attention let alone scold him for it.

Finally, after he had eaten a small lunch of various soft foods -that he didn't taste, the boy caught sight of his blond Sentoki standing outside of the school gates, waiting for him. Often he randomly found himself wondering why no one seemed to question why a college student loitered and smoked outside of a junior high school almost every day, other than the one time Shinonome-sensei had brought it up. Though none of that was on his mind today, his ears lifted as he straightened in his seat and his face brightened for the first time all day.

A curious Yuiko followed his gaze and smiled happily. She had spent her day surreptitiously watching him and Ritsuka had seemed even more reserved today than normal and Yuiko worried, but she understood now. Whatever had brought Ritsuka down was related to the blond in some way (it always seemed that way to her) but Soubi would fix whatever it was that troubled Ritsuka; one way or another, he always seemed to do that too. Yuiko didn't really question the strange dynamics of their relastionship all Yuiko knew was that she wouldn't have to worry now so she faced the front of the class and tried to figure out what Shinonome-sensei was attempting to teach.

Ritsuka sighed as his class was released. He swiftly made his way to the college student; his face tinged red in what he tried to convince himself was anger. The blond smiled because he knew better - Ritsuka's eager walk and attentive ears, as he made his way over, betrayed him. Soubi had the sudden inexplicable urge to nibble on them.

The purple eyed boy looked up at the taller man and asked, "Why are you here?" His voice showed more curiosity than the usual anger it usually held when Soubi came to collect him after school. His wide amethyst eyes were begging to know why Soubi hadn't said good-bye before he'd left, even though it was something he would never allow himself to ask or even acknowledge wanting to know.

Soubi held back a smirk at Ritsuka's stubborn will, his absolute unwillingness to show his affection for him, it would only anger his little Sacrifice. "To see you," Soubi answered simply, leaving the unasked question unanswered. Knowing that the boy had missed him made Soubi happy. His blue eyes were verging on twinkling as he held his hand out for Ritsuka. He was almost positive that, had he stayed, he would have been scolded and avoided by his dark haired boy. It was his habit whenever Soubi dared to get too close, closer then Ritsuka was ready to admit he wanted Soubi to be. However, being missed, the boy allowed his Sentoki to take his hand with minimal hesitance.

The entire walk to Ritsuka's home was uneventful; besides a few bewildered looks from people that passed them that Soubi was far too happy to see. The stares didn't bother him - he was far too enthralled by the way Ritsuka's small worm hand fit so comfortably and warmly in his own, and the soft texture of the skin. Ritsuka figured it would was far better if the older man didn't notice; Soubi would only use the chance to provoke him and the people by doing something worse, like kissing him.

"Would you take a picture of my name for me? I want to see it better. I can't see it too well with only the mirror." Ritsuka said, breaking the comfortable silence as they neared his home, avoiding the blonde's eyes, he feigned interest in a bright and almost neon colored display of computers in a store window as they passed it. Of course, Soubi wasn't fooled but he said nothing.

"Will I get a copy?" Soubi asked, only partially to get a rise out of the boy, his blue eyes shining in mirth.

"If I say yes, will you take it for me?" Ritsuka asked, a blush staining his cheeks as he looked up at the blond.

"You could always just order me to take it." Soubi said with a small smile and a half-shrug, his flippant actions and words betraying the giddy feeling he received at just the prospect. He knew very well that, unless it was absolutely necessary, the black haired boy would always refuse to order him. He wasn't sure why the boy refused to embrace him fully but he could wait – to the end of days, Soubi could and would wait.

"You can have a copy." Soubi smiled at Ritsuka's answer and watched as he entered the house, and then he went to climb up to the boy's room to wait. He climbed slowly, taking the time he knew he had before his Sacrifice reached his room, and contemplated the pros and cons of investing in a ladder.

The neko-boy had no sooner opened the door before his mother caught him by surprise with a well-aimed slap accompanied by an unintelligible yell. He turned wide purple eyes to her and managed to dodge the next blow. With a grimace and his ears flat against his head, he quickly scrambled upstairs, easily outrunning is mom.

He cradled his stinging cheek right at the bone, he rubbed it lightly; he had no doubt that it would bruise very soon. Ritsuka sighed in irritation as he opened the bedroom door. Soubi lay on his bed, blond hair splayed across the pillow facing the door as he waited. The blond shook his head and looked away his jaw and fists clenched in anger as he saw the boy holding his wounded face. As much as it pained him to hear what happened downstairs, he was forbidden to do anything about it.

"It could stop whenever you wanted it to." The ambiguous remark was shrugged off by the boy. The blond shook his head again and said, "You know that you have options. You could stay with me," he said, not for the first time. Knowing he wouldn't receive an answer, Soubi stood and took the camera from on top of the boy's monitor with only slightly more force than was necessary.

"Maybe," Ritsuka said belatedly with a shrug. The blue eyed man nearly dropped the camera in his surprise; he fumbled with it trying to keep it in his hands and not in pieces on the floor. He turned sharply to look at the boy, but Ritsuka was looking away, apparently studying the pictures he had posted on his board. He filed the response away to think on later. Soubi would have no luck if he tried to pursue the conversation, so instead he smirked and said, "Are you going to get undressed?"

Ritsuka turned around swiftly and looked at Soubi with a calculating look, trying to decide if it was really necessary. "Do I have to? Couldn't I just pull down my pants a bit and my shirt up?" he asked, biting his lip nervously.

"Oh no! You should take off your clothes. It wouldn't look as good; you just wouldn't be able to see it well enough." Soubi said with conviction and a nod.

Usually the boy would have put up a fight, but he figured that it would, in fact, be much more visible if he did shed his clothing, like the day before. Ritsuka went to the bathroom and undressed, wrapping a towel around his narrow waist, tucking his tail under and making sure to keep it close to his body, so that there was nothing to hinder the view of the name. Soubi took the time to tie his blond hair back and out of his face. It just wouldn't do to have anything obstructing his sight.

Soubi adjusted the towel a bit more so that 'Loveless' could be seen clearly. He moved Ritsuka so that he was directly in front of him; his hands lingered on the boy's pale hips. He knelt, just as the day before, his thumbs caressing the smooth skin, and placed a small kiss on the name, his tongue peeked out of its own accord to lick the dip of his back just above the name. He slipped his arms around the slim waist of his Sacrifice and held him close, resting his head on the small of his back. He inhaled the natural scent of the boy's body greedily as he kissed at the supple cream-like skin. Ritsuka was so engrossed in the sensation Soubi was evoking that he didn't even bother to rush him along or resist in anyway. Eventually, the blond managed to convince himself to reach down for the camera and took the picture, although he'd had nowhere near his fill of the opiate flesh.

Ritsuka allowed himself to be followed as he slipped back into the bathroom. With a glance at his Sentoki, he said, "I'm only going to shower." He would've much rather liked a bath, but he wasn't sure he trusted Soubi to behave that long. He had been very affectionate lately (he was almost willing to admit that they both had been), so he would make it quick. When his Sentoki made no move to leave Ristuka exclaimed "If you insist on staying, you have to turn around!" his cheeks hot as he pointed to the wall in the opposite direction. Stripping quickly, and almost falling in his haste, he stepped into the shower and awkwardly began to scrub at his body; he felt his Sentoki's presence acutely as if he was next to him. He could swear he felt eyes on him and kept looking back at his Sentoki, but Soubi was always dutifully staring at the wall as he'd been told. Shrugging it off as paranoia and a heightened aweareness to his Sentoki's presence, Ritsuka finished washing his hair and turned in time to see the blond face the wall again. He fought a smile and blushed, turning off the water, he didn't bother to take the time to wondering why he liked the thought of Soubi looking at him. He made short work of drying off with his favorite big fluffy towel and slipped on sleeping pants.

Bending over to retrieve his sleeping shirt, he yelped suddenly, as he felt himself pitch backward and Soubi lifted him up off the floor. "Put me down! I can walk! I haven't even finished getting dressed!" Ritsuka protested as his arms unconsciously slipped around the taller man's neck, but he was ignored. Soubi nestled his face into his Sacrifice's hair. The boy's ears flattened as he sulked in the blond's arms, trying not to snuggle deeper as he was carried to his bed. Soubi laid him down gently, and Ritsuka moved over automatically to make room for his Sentoki, who slipped in beside him after retrieving the camera again.

Soubi embraced him close, placing small kisses on the boy's head, cheeks, forehead, nose, and finally a soft kiss to his willing lips. With a deep breath of Ritsuka's scent, he sighed contentedly. Tightened his arms around the boy, Soubi held the camera so that Ritsuka could see it. "Does this look ok?" the blond asked, showing his Sacrifice the picture he'd taken.

The boy nodded. Soubi sat up and switched off the camera, placing it above Ritsuka's pillow. He pulled the band from his hair and stuck it around his right wrist. He looked down reverently at his Sacrifice, causing the younger boy to blush. Ritskua watched curiously as, instead of laying beside him again, his Sentoki moved lower on his body and lay his head on his flat tummy. Soubi kissed at the skin of his stomach and nuzzled it. Ritsuka had to fight the want to purr, though he did let his hand wander down and his fingers to run through his Soubi's soft hair.

Before either knew it, they had lulled each other into a peaceful slumber.


	3. First half of Chapter 3

Ritsuka shifted in his bed and snuggled down into its warmth, pulling the comforter closer to himself. With a sigh he happily opened his eyes- to come face to face with an empty bed. His eyes filled with sadness as he ran an outstretched arm along the abandoned space that should have been occupied by his Sentoki. He rolled over onto the side of the bed that he'd come to think of as belonging to Soubi. Snuggling into the still warm bedding, he nuzzled his face into the pillow that gave off the unique and rather intriguing scent that usually clung to the blond. It was a rather odd mix of sakura, musk, crisp clean water, and cigarettes.

He pulled the pillows between his arms and legs and hugged them in an attempt to feel as though he was embracing a body, a hopeless attempt to rid himself of the aching sense of loneliness. Soubi had begun to spend the night more often, practically living at Ritsuka's home during the evenings for the greater part of the week, and Ritsuka still had yet to wake up with him. It was maddening, not to mention highly annoying. A soft pout rested on Ritsuka's full lips as his ears flattened against his head in irritation. The pillow was a completely inadequate replacement for his Sentoki he decided as he pushed it away. He sighed in frustration and a slight hint of sadness.

Resolved not to bother getting out of bed yet, the amethyst eyed boy yawned and tried to go back to sleep, school could wait. Before he began to drift off, in fact before he had even gotten comfortable, he heard the distinct sound of his shower turning off. He shot up in his bed, his back straight and ears moving back to listen closer in the direction of the bathroom door.

He hadn't even realized his shower was on, his depression being the only thing that had occupied his mind. Ritsuka cursed to himself for not having realized he hadn't been abandoned. Although he had been needlessly left to wake up alone, the blond hadn't even left the room! His face reddened in anger at having had to wake up alone, anger that wasn't necessarily at the blond, though it wouldn't stop him from taking it out on Soubi per usual.

His anger completely dissipated as the blond bombshell walked from the bathroom slipping his shirt on. Ritsuka scarcely had time to stop his mouth from dropping open, though he couldn't stop his eyes from widening. He eyed the pale flesh, flesh that he knew to be smoother than silk, where it wasn't scarred. He watched as the arms adjusted the shirt, arms that he knew to be covered in blond hair so thin and soft that it could only be seen in a certain light. The fact that it was still slightly damp made the blonde's skin glisten in the most enticing way. His eyes lingering on the pale line of flesh where the college student's shirt didn't quite meet the low slung waist of his pants, where his belly button and hipbones were completely visible.

The purple eyed boy had the strange and completely inexplicable urge to touch it. He silently watched as the blond dried his long hair. When he was completely sure that the other man was engrossed in his task and unaware of him, Ritsuka surreptitiously slipped out of bed and went to wrap his arms around the exposed flesh. He stilled, reveling on the skin to skin contact. Though it was minimal, it still gave his heart a slight jump in exhilaration. There was something about Soubi that made the boy's heart beat faster the closer he was to him. Since the day they had met, it only seemed to be getting worse. It was part of the reason he was so severe with Soubi; the adrenaline of being so close to the Sentoki made his moods so much sharper, for the good and bad.

Soubi jumped as the thin arms of his Sacrifice made their way around him. He looked down over his shoulders at the dark head that was snuggling into the small of his back. Smiling affectionately he ran a hand through the shorter boy's silky hair.

"Ohayo," he said quietly, letting his affection resonate in his voice and the contentment shine in his eyes. He received no response from the boy as he continued to slowly run his thin artistic fingers though his Sacrifice's feather soft, borderline blue-toned hair.

Realizing the boy wasn't going to release him any time soon, Soubi turned to face him so that Ritsuka's head was now resting on his flat tummy. Soubi rubbed at the boy's back and asked, "Are you ok?" The slight worry he felt easily seeped into his tone of voice, as one hand moved to carefully caress the bruise on the boy's cheek bone and trace the cut caused by his mothers wedding ring, that he knew would be covered with gauze later. He received a silent nod in return. 

Ritsuka turned and grabbed his own clothes for a shower. "Do you have classes today?" He asked with his back still turned.

"Yes," Soubi answered his sacrifice, his head tilted as he tried to gauge what sort of mood the boy was in.

Ritsuka nodded and said, "You should go. Will you be here when I get home?"

Soubi nodded, surprised that his Sacrifice remembered that today was a long day for him. His eyes followed Ritsuka's slender figure disappear into the bathroom before he stepped out of the room and silently closed the balcony door behind himself, though the only sign was a slight upturning of his lips. His Ritsuka actually paid attention to when he had class!

Soubi shared the small secretive smile with himself that would be seen various times threw out the day - as he climbed down from his sacrifice's room, on his walk to class, sitting in class, while he finished up his final project for the week, and even while he pretended to listen to what Kio was talking about during lunch. It was even present as he opened the balcony door and lay out on his sacrifice's bed to await Ritsuka's return from school.


	4. Second half of Chapter 3

Misaki felt comforted by the simple and repetitive task of chopping fish for the sashimi she was preparing for dinner. The sharp blade sliding easily through the fish calmed her in a way nothing else could. Coming in through the kitchen window behind her, the soft sunlight warmed her. A small smile flitted on her face as she waited for her son to come home today, the hope that today he would be the day he finally reverted back to being her son drove her to happiness. So relaxed was she that she nearly dropped the entire cutting board when she heard the sound of footsteps on the floor above. In Ritsuka's room. With her gaze fixed on the ceiling, she backed into the alcove between the refrigerator and the pantry. She gripped the knife tightly in a white-knuckled fist.

It was _him_, the one for whom Ritsuka always lied. She felt her face flush. There was no doubt that it was the blond man, the one she'd seen with Ritsuka. Her stormy expression hardened as her thoughts progressed. He was always so close to Ritsuka, talking to him, holding him, bringing Ritsuka to lie to spend time with him to sneak into her home. _Her_ Ritsuka never had any need for friends; she and Seimei had been enough. There had never been a need for others.

Why was that man here now? What could Ritsuka possibly want him for? What did he offer Ritsuka that she did not? Seimei may be gone, but she was still here. Why hadn't Ritsuka come to her? Why didn't he want her (his own mother!), who loved and understood him best? These questions circled in her mind, agitating her. Misaki's hand tightened on the knife as her anger mounted. Making her way purposely toward the stairs, she stopped as she heard the front door open.

Cautiously, Ritsuka opened the front door to his house to a narrow crack, just wide enough to push his slim body through. Pasting himself against the wall, he looked over to the living room to find it empty. He glanced down the hall and found it to be clear, as was what he could see of the second floor. He let his breath out in a quick rush. The tension flowed out of his slight body and his heart beat slowing as he walked to the kitchen to get a drink. Humming quietly to himself, he opened the refrigerator door and bent down to examine its contents.

"I'm not stupid." He jumped despite the quite tone in which the voice had spoken, and turned so quickly that he almost pitched himself off balance. "What?" he asked, eyeing his mother warily.

"I'm not stupid. I've heard you talking to _him_." The last word was practically spat as Misaki stared coldly into her son's now guarded eyes. "All hours of day and night you talk, staying out to see him coming home at indecent hours, and yet you cannot even have dinner with me."

Ritsuka resisted the urge to apologize – he knew it wouldn't do him any good – so he simply held her gaze.

"_My,_ Ritsuka would never sneak people into the house. _My_ Ritsuka was never so sneaky, not like you - a little snake." It unnerved Ritsuka how calmly his mother was speaking; her tone was utterly flat, and her face so blank, devoid of all emotion. It frightened him. "No matter how hard I try to scrub it from you." Ritsuka flinched at the painful memory of almost scalding water. "I cannot clean you, no matter how hard I've tried. Why can't I clean you?" Ritsuka hugged himself to keep his arms from reaching out to hold his mother. The ache inside him was almost unbearable; just looking at the saddened and confused expression on her face tore at his heart.

"I try so hard." At the desperation in her voice, Ritsuka ignored the one in his own head that warned him against action and pulled her into his arms.

"Don't touch me!" she screamed. Her face flushed at her filthy son's gesture. She pushed him back, still armed with the knife. "You are not my Ritsuka," she cried, her resentment climbing, "You are not good enough." As her rage peaked, she slashed at his skin with the knife, and clawed at him with the other hand. Unrelentingly she pushed, continuing even as he fell hard to the ground. Sitting on top of him, she persisted to slash at his skin, the blood of her now only son splashing her once pristine dress and the white walls of the kitchen.

Ritsuka lifted up an arm to cover his face and tried to grab her arm with his free hand; finally succeeding and getting a hold on her forearm, he pushed her away. The sound of the knife as it skidded across the floor and her back slamming against the counter top resounded in the small kitchen.

Ritsuka stood; he could already feel the blood beginning to run down his face and arms. The act of breathing stung and the coppery air made him swoon slightly. She stared at him with an expression of disbelief and betrayal on her face. Ritsuka looked up, trying not to let his shame show. He had never fought his mother off, or retaliated in any way; he had always just taken the pain or run away. Her face flushed red in anger; she lifted her hand to slap him. Ritsuka didn't even try to protect himself. His body tensed in anticipation.

The blow never landed; it had stopped by a strong hand.

Ritsuka glanced up at his mother's gasp. He saw Soubi, whose wrathful gaze was fixed on Misaki. The ferocity of his expression was both beautiful and frightening, like liquid mercury. Wordlessly, Soubi released her wrist from his tight grasp with a violent jerk that nearly made her lose her balance again, and he gently took Ritsuka's hand, and walked out of the kitchen. The blond silently fumed as he softly urged his sacrifice upstairs. There was so much he yearned to say, to do, and yet he couldn't. It would only upset Ritsuka, because after all, she was his mother.

Never had he wished to disobey an order more than he did at that moment, but Ritsuka was more important, Soubi reasoned as he carefully maneuvered the boy to sit on his bed.


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Soubi led Ritsuka to the room and to the bed and sat him down. Silent anger continued to radiate from his rigid body; his cheeks long since stained a heated pink. The younger male, who seemed to be in a state of oblivion, simply allowed Soubi to move him at will. Ritsuka's purple eyes followed Soubi as he locked the bedroom door and made his way to the bathroom. When he returned it was with a familiar little box, the familiar Red Cross stood stark against the white background.

Soubi noticed when Ritsuka stopped following his movements and simply began to stare into space; all sense of his surroundings seemed to have simply flowed out of him. The blood was slowly swelling from the cuts and scratches, spilling over the gashes in the skin like beautiful crimson tears. Soubi felt the sudden urge to lick them. Instead he sat next to the boy, opened the box, and began to clean the blood up to sanitize the wounds beneath. It didn't take long to realize that he wasn't making much of a difference trying to clean up with the small alcohol and gauze squares, so with a sigh he gathered them up and threw them away.

"We will have to bathe you; this isn't working," the blond said, his voice going flat as he attempted to convey calm, none of which gained him more than a blink in response as Ritsuka stared stoically into space. Soubi sighed and pressed a soft kiss to Ritsuka's forehead as he pulled the pliable teen back into his arms.

The blond carried his light weighted boy into the bathroom and tactfully and clinically undressed him, the care of his Sacrifice the only thing on Soubi's mind. He slowly lowered Ritsuka into the bath tub. He didn't bother to fill the bath completely, but instead filled it with only a few inches of warm water and grabbed a wash cloth.

Soubi chose not to use soap, not wanting to irritate the cuts and scratches, and carefully began to wash the blood away, being gentle around the wounds. The majority of them didn't look as though they would scar, but there was a few across the boy's arms, and one along his chest, that were quite deep and would need butterflies and even still may scar. As Soubi moved toward his face, it looked as though there were no knife wounds, but the scratches from mother's nails were copious. When he reached Ritsuka's neck, the younger male blinked slowly. He reached up and batted at the fair hand. "Stop, I can do it, I've been doing it myself for years. I don't need you. I don't need your help," Ritsuka protested. Purple eyes glared into blue as Ritsuka held out a demanding hand for the wash cloth.

All of this was ignored as Soubi continued to clean Ritsuka all through the boy's cries of "Leave me alone" and "Get off me." The blond even managed to clean quite a bit despite the slim arms flailing around and the indignant glares sent his way.

"Will you get off me? I can do it myself!" The now pouting boy said, his arms crossed and hair sticking up in odd angles, the only reward for his struggles.

"I know you can," the blond said softly and calmly. "This is for me, I need to do this."

Ritsuka tilted his head as he looked at his Fighter. His Fighter, who had looked ready to murder just moments ago, now looked as sedated as a kitten that had had its fill of cream. The blond was watching his hand as it made its way across the slightly sun-kissed skin of the boy who was his to serve. He humphed for good measure before sitting back and allowing Soubi to slowly wipe away the remnants of the blood and help to sooth an inner ache he did not wish to acknowledge with his careful movements and light touch.

Purple eyes watched Soubi's silent and content face as he continued to wash, despite the blood being long since washed away and the wounds clotted. "The water is getting cold," Ritsuka said with a slight shiver.

The blond stopped and nodded. He stood, grabbed the towel from the rack, and held it with his arms spread wide, averting his gaze.

The boy blushed, but stood up. He moved near the towel and wordlessly allowed the taller male to wrap him up. He gasped as he was lifted up and held close to a strong chest. "I can walk you know," he said without conviction as he allowed himself to snuggle slightly closer.

Soubi set Ritsuka down and dried him with the same clinical accuracy as before. Ritsuka allowed it with the knowledge that being able to touch and care for him was a way to reassure Soubi that his Sacrifice was ok. Soubi took care to bandage Ritsuka's deeper wounds as gently as possible but made sure the butterflies held the wounds as tightly as possible.

Once he was dry and bandaged, Ritsuka batted the blond's hands away and took the towel to wrap back around himself. He made his way toward the dresser, stopping short when he caught sight of a bag on his computer chair. Moving closer, he peeked inside the open top to see a pair of blue sleeping pants. Soubi had brought sleeping clothes. The knowledge – that Soubi was so comfortable with Ritsuka, he felt it ok to bring clothing and bathroom amenities over – gave the boy an odd fuzzy feeling that seem to travel from his stomach to his chest and back. He said nothing as he grabbed his own sleeping clothes and slipped them on, first moving the towel to his hips to put on his shirt and then using it as a shield by slipping his pants on underneath it.

He turned around to find his Fighter sitting on the bed, staring at his hands. "Are you going to get ready for bed?" he asked. The blond looked up and gave the boy a small smile before nodding. He grabbed his bag and went to the restroom.

Ritsuka made himself comfortable on the bed, turning onto his side, as he waited for Soubi. A contemplative look crinkled his forehead.

When Soubi emerged, Ritsuka looked up and realized that the pants he had seen made up the entirety of Soubi's sleeping clothes. With a blush, he looked away and faced the wall, pulling his comforter higher. He felt the bed dip as Soubi climbed in and the feel of the comforter moving as he adjusted it over himself. When the movement stopped, the boy allowed himself to relax into the bed, only to jump when he felt himself being pulled back into Soubi's chest and held within strong arms. Sighing, he decided he was far too comfortable and tired to move or fight at the moment. He felt the blond hair tickle across his face as Soubi leaned to press a soft kiss against his cheek, and then another to his temple before laying back down. Perhaps it was the emotionally trying day, or the warm bath, or the comfort that his _Sentoki _provided, but it was within those strong arms that he felt safe enough to quietly whisper, "I don't think I can stay here much longer."


	6. Interlude

Misaki sat heavily on the floor her hair askew from the struggle. The man had stolen her son. She had worked so hard to keep him, to have her son. She stood and straightened her clothing and hair with a sigh. She grabbed her bag and walked out the door.


	7. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 **

**AN: I reworked the previous chapters again.**

Ritsuka awoke encased in warmth of his _Sentoki's_ arms and surrounded by the unique smell that seemed to have settled itself into his room this past month. The scent was now just as much a part of the room as the blond had become. Ritsuka decided that the combination was easily enough incentive to make him never want to leave his bed again. He shifted and gasped as his wounds from his mother protested. The pain reminded him of her awful reaction to Soubi; well, to be honest, Soubi was probably only a catalyst for her anger. His mother only seemed to be looking for a reason to hurt him these days. It hurt him that he couldn't make her happy, that he wasn't what she wanted, and that he couldn't be what she wanted. If he was honest with himself, it also hurt that he no longer wanted to be what she wanted. He was beginning to feel content with himself, the self that she hated.

Soubi watched Ritsuka awaken; he witnessed the small content smile on his face that accompanied it. He also watched as it subsequently succumbed to the dark thoughts that crept upon the boy as he lay in pain both physical and emotional. With a sigh Soubi squeezed Ritsuka closer; the boy's ears twitched as the warm breath of his _Sentoki _blew across them. He snuggled back into the warmth and comfort Soubi offered.

He turned and looked into the vibrant blue eyes of his Fighter and smiled softly at the blond's mussed hair. Ritsuka ran his hand through the blond strands, attempting to subdue the wild strands but only managing to make it worse somehow.

"Don't you have class this morning?" he asked, keeping his eyes on the blond hair he was now playing with, giving up on taming it. The blue eyed man sedately nodded in affirmation. "Will you help me with my bandages before you go?" The amethyst eyed male asked, well aware of the fact that he had yelled that he didn't need or want help from Soubi just a few hours before. It was a slight concession on his part that he would accept his _Sentoki's_ help, a small display of his trust.

The blue eyed man smiled brightly and replied with a happy "Of course." The first-aid box was still sitting on Ritsuka's computer chair from the night before. Soubi grabbed it as Ritsuka gingerly took his pajama shirt off, ever mindful of his wounds. The _Sentoki _slowly began to bandage Ritsuka's arms first, they having sustained the most damage.

Ritsuka looked on in amusement as more and more of his arms were bandaged and wrapped. "I look like a mummy," he said with a small laugh. Soubi chuckled lightly as he moved to begin on his Sacrifice's face which didn't need the bandages but were used to hide the wounds. He attempted to cover as many as he could with as few bandages as possible.

"You should wear a long sleeve shirt today so that no one will see these," Soubi said as he cast a sad glance at Ritsuka's arms. The skin was hardly visible through the amount of bandages he had had to use; only random strips peeked through.

"You're right," Ritsuka replied as he glanced down at his arms in irritation.

"I hate bandaging my arms. As soon as I know I can't get to the skin, it begins to itch. How annoying."

The blond smiled over at his Sacrifice and shook his head lightly at the strange comment. He said, "I won't be able to come over for a few days; the semester is ending and I have a few projects that need to be worked on. But you can always email or call me."

"You need to shower so you can get to class on time." The younger male told the man with a slight unconscious pout at the thought of them having to separate. Soubi nodded in agreement and replied, "So should you."

"You go first; you need to be to class earlier than I do, and you have farther to walk." Ritsuka told him, waving his arm towards the bathroom. The blond smiled and said with as much innocence as he could muster over what he was about to say, "Perhaps we should just shower together, to be sure that neither of us is late that is." Ritsuka shot him a surprised look before he blushed and threw a towel at the blond and said "Go take a shower!" His ears were flat against his head in irritation and embarrassment and face flaming red.

Soubi walked into the bathroom laughing.

Ritsuka came home from school to a dark house, and with it being winter, there was hardly any light left outside with which to see. There was no fumbling as his fingers flicked the well used switch next to the door. He surveyed his immediate surroundings and, despite its benign appearance, proceeded cautiously past the doorway and into the house. Moving around the house with the same caution, he entered and peeked into every room, only find each just as empty as the last. He wandered back to the kitchen and then back through the living room, knowing he would find nothing. The house was quiet, calm, and it all unnerved Ritsuka to no ends.

With a small shrug he moved to the couch and sat uneasily as he decided to wait for his mother. He pulled a book from his school bag and began to read to help pass the time. After an hour, he fought a yawn and slowly slid into a slouch. His eyes began to droop after two. At the three hour mark, he had gone from slouching to lying down on his side, still reading. Not long after that, his book could be heard hitting the floor as he drifted off into a semi-peaceful sleep.

When Ritsuka awoke he noticed several things at once; the first being that the house was still unnaturally quite, the second being that night was already heavily underway, and the third that it seemed that no one had been home while he was sleeping either.

He sat up - his hair a mess and eyelids still heavy - and scratched at his bandaged arms through his long sleeved shirt as he yawned, his ears twitching as he listened for any sound.

There was none.

With a frown he searched the refrigerator, the counter, and the living room table for a note that perhaps he had missed on his first search of the house.

There was nothing.

He used the phone in the kitchen to call his mother's cell phone, his father's work, and his father's cell phone respectively.

There was no answer.

At a loss as to what to do now, Ritsuka sat heavily onto the couch again. With a frown he decided finally to check his cell phone to see if there were any missed calls, not that he expected any as neither of his parents knew he had a phone.

It was nearly midnight now according to his phone. Looking around slightly scared and paranoid, every slight noise made him jump. The dark had never seemed more malicious and suffocating. He bolted upright and ran up the stairs and into his room. He slammed the door closed, pausing only long enough to lock it before rushing to the spot on the side of his desk where he was completely hidden from the door once he pulled his knees to his chest. Ritsuka held his knees so tightly his knuckles whitened as he squeezed in his frustration. "I don't _understand_." He whispered, fighting the urge to punch the closest wall. His tears welled in his eyes; they fell over and his eyes shone a beautiful Tyrian purple at his turmoil and desperation. "Why would they leave me? Did they forget me? Or do they no longer want me?" He had so many horrible questions filling his head each worse than the last and no answers to calm him. Ritsuka felt so lost. What should he do? What could he do? What does one do when one's parents have abandoned them?

Ritsuka pulled his cell phone from his pocket and stared at the little square glowing screen flashing the late hour. It was nearing one and there was only one person he wanted to call. Was it too late? Did it matter? He was told to call any time and that Soubi would always answer - did he mean it? Could he trust him…

Soubi lay the paint brush aside, the familiar ringtone making Kio roll his eyes and making the blond frown. It wasn't often that Ritsuka initiated a call and then never so late.

Kio huffed in annoyance and said, "What's he doing up at this hour? It's far past time for good little boys to be in bed."

Soubi shrugged and walked onto the balcony despite the cold to answer the phone.

"Moshi moshi?" He said, the worry clear in his voice. His greeting was met with silence. "Ritsuka?" he said, the worry in his voice increasing. "Ritsuka?" he repeated as the silence made him anxious. "Ritsuka, are you ok?" he said, his anxiety rising as more seconds pass. He quieted and listened closely; much to his relief, he could hear his Sacrifice breathing.

"Soubi, I need you to do something for me." Ritsuka said in a quiet and small voice. There was almost a childlike quality to his Sacrifice's voice that Soubi couldn't recall ever having heard before.

There were a million questions he wanted to ask, but he forced himself not to ask them. "Anything," the tense blond replied instead.

"Soubi, I need you to come for me." Ritsuka said quietly and Soubi wasn't sure whether he had imagined the note of panic in his Sacrifice's voice or not. "Come for you?" he parroted back. "I need you to come and get me," Ritsuka repeated. Once Soubi realized that he hadn't imagined the panic in his Ritsuka's voice and understood that he had to go pick him up, he quickly rushed into the apartment and grabbed his keys as he said, "I'll be there."

"Please hurry" was all he heard before the dial tone.

**AN: Reviews are love!**


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